Five tips on returning to work
HR Consultant, Desiree Wegner, shares her top tips.
Here’s the thing. As a mother it’s ok to want to go back to work. As a person whose job gave them meaning, creativity and purpose before having a baby, why would you want to give that up?
It doesn’t mean that parenthood gives you the opposite of that, it just means that you are a better mother BECAUSE you work.
And here’s the other thing.
As a mother, it’s okay NOT to want to go back to work either. You have found that meaning, creativity and purpose in that chubby, giggly little version of yourself and I don’t blame you for not wanting to give that up.
I would say that THIS is my #1 top tip for returning back to work:
1. OWN YOUR CHOICES
I’m here to tell you that whatever choice you make, it’s ok. There is no right and there is no wrong, there just is whatever YOU and your family need at that present time.
2. USE YOUR KIT DAYS
As a statutory right in the UK for mothers on maternity / adoption leave, Mothers are allowed up to 10 KIT (Keeping-in-Touch) paid days as part of your maternity / adoption leave and it won’t affect your leave or pay!
I know a lot of mums who’ve used these days to help ease themselves back into meetings; reconnect with colleagues; catch up on projects or just go back in to clear out their email inbox! It can be taken anytime during your leave period (except for your first two weeks of compulsory leave) and you can use some or all it.
It’s such a great way to dip your toe back into the proverbial “water”, as well as a great way to find out if you really do want to go back to work or not.
Make sure that you don’t exceed the 10 days as this will AUTOMATICALLY end your maternity leave by law. Keep an accurate record of your KIT days, and note that 1 day equals the number of hours you come in for, so it still counts as a full KIT Day even if you only work part of it (like a half day for example).
Make sure you arrange with your Manager / HR department before coming in for your first KIT Day (surprise, I’m back, bet you weren’t expecting to see me today!).
3. HAVE ‘THE CONVERSATION’
It’s important to have a very clear and factual conversation around boundaries and expectations with your line manager before you return, or at very latest, on the day you start back at work.
What do I mean by “the conversation”? Well, there may be a chance that your manager doesn’t understand your situation, either because they don’t have children or they had children a long time ago when times were different. Help them understand and guide the conversation towards “so how will WE deal with this [xx] situation, if it arises?”. It’s about keeping those lines of communication open as best you can.
Decide together on what you can put in place to ensure that the business feels that it’s getting the best out of you and that you feel you’re giving what you can, taking into account yours and your child’s needs.
Reaching a win: win arrangement for all, helps to better position you when situations arise such as:
· Baby getting sick (this can happen a lot 😁)
· Your childcare letting you down last minute
· An unexpected emergency
· What does good performance look like to both of you?
There’s nothing wrong with being proactive and having this adult conversation before situations arise. Have them, so that you know exactly what is and what is not expected.
Also make yourself aware of your company’s family policies and if in doubt, ask your manager or HR department where you can read more about them.
4. BUILD A SUPPORT NETWORK AROUND YOU
Every superhero has a sidekick, and every Mum needs a support network around her when returning back to work. Having a couple of people on standby to call when you need to, is a great idea to have.
In my view, don’t let the taking-care-of-baby-when-they-fall-sick rest solely on your shoulders.
If your partner’s company is flexible, then having a conversation with your partner will ensure that you have a balanced approach on who gets to step out of work when the other one can’t. it also helps to show your employer that you are aware of the give-and-take principle, BUT that they can expect the same from you when you need to step out when it’s your turn.
It’s all about boundaries, communication and trust within the employer-and-employee relationship, so having a support network that can step in when needed to, will make all the difference to your work / personal life.
5. INVEST IN YOURSELF
If you’ve made the decision to go back to work (or even if you don’t), then I’d say — always invest in yourself!
Take a course to update your skills.
Review your “personal brand” on Linkedin and yes, update that CV that you haven’t thought of for a while.
Consider getting a career coach or mentor through Mentor Mums, to help you navigate this process too. Not only will this help prepare your mindset for returning to work, but it will also give you a confidence boost and remind yourself of why you are so good at what you do!
Desiree Wegner is an HR professional and Founder of a boutique Leadership and Career Coaching and Consultancy service. Desiree loves helping mums transition back into their definition of work and she’s determined to help make the workplace a more human, accepting and inclusive space for all by educating and challenging the norms that are in the current structures of work. Follow her @HERE’S THE THING. AS A MOTHER, IT’S OKAY TO WANT TO GO BACK TO WORK. AS A PERSON WHOSE JOB GAVE THEM MEANING, CREATIVITY AND PURPOSE BEFORE HAVING A BABY, WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO GIVE THAT UP?
It doesn’t mean that parenthood gives you the opposite of that, it just means that you are a better mother BECAUSE you work.
And here’s the other thing.
As a mother, it’s okay NOT to want to go back to work either. You have found that meaning, creativity and purpose in that chubby, giggly little version of yourself and I don’t blame you for not wanting to give that up.
I would say that THIS is my #1 top tip for returning back to work:
1. OWN YOUR CHOICES
I’m here to tell you that whatever choice you make, it’s ok. There is no right and there is no wrong, there just is whatever YOU and your family need at that present time.
2. USE YOUR KIT DAYS
As a statutory right in the UK for mothers on maternity / adoption leave, Mothers are allowed up to 10 KIT (Keeping-in-Touch) paid days as part of your maternity / adoption leave and it won’t affect your leave or pay!
I know a lot of mums who’ve used these days to help ease themselves back into meetings; reconnect with colleagues; catch up on projects or just go back in to clear out their email inbox! It can be taken anytime during your leave period (except for your first two weeks of compulsory leave) and you can use some or all it.
It’s such a great way to dip your toe back into the proverbial “water”, as well as a great way to find out if you really do want to go back to work or not.
Make sure that you don’t exceed the 10 days as this will AUTOMATICALLY end your maternity leave by law. Keep an accurate record of your KIT days, and note that 1 day equals the number of hours you come in for, so it still counts as a full KIT Day even if you only work part of it (like a half day for example).
Make sure you arrange with your Manager / HR department before coming in for your first KIT Day (surprise, I’m back, bet you weren’t expecting to see me today!).
3. HAVE ‘THE CONVERSATION’
It’s important to have a very clear and factual conversation around boundaries and expectations with your line manager before you return, or at very latest, on the day you start back at work.
What do I mean by “the conversation”? Well, there may be a chance that your manager doesn’t understand your situation, either because they don’t have children or they had children a long time ago when times were different. Help them understand and guide the conversation towards “so how will WE deal with this [xx] situation, if it arises?”. It’s about keeping those lines of communication open as best you can.
Decide together on what you can put in place to ensure that the business feels that it’s getting the best out of you and that you feel you’re giving what you can, taking into account yours and your child’s needs.
Reaching a win: win arrangement for all, helps to better position you when situations arise such as:
· Baby getting sick (this can happen a lot 😁)
· Your childcare letting you down last minute
· An unexpected emergency
· What does good performance look like to both of you?
There’s nothing wrong with being proactive and having this adult conversation before situations arise. Have them, so that you know exactly what is and what is not expected.
Also make yourself aware of your company’s family policies and if in doubt, ask your manager or HR department where you can read more about them.
4. BUILD A SUPPORT NETWORK AROUND YOU
Every superhero has a sidekick, and every Mum needs a support network around her when returning back to work. Having a couple of people on standby to call when you need to, is a great idea to have.
In my view, don’t let the taking-care-of-baby-when-they-fall-sick rest solely on your shoulders.
If your partner’s company is flexible, then having a conversation with your partner will ensure that you have a balanced approach on who gets to step out of work when the other one can’t. it also helps to show your employer that you are aware of the give-and-take principle, BUT that they can expect the same from you when you need to step out when it’s your turn.
It’s all about boundaries, communication and trust within the employer-and-employee relationship, so having a support network that can step in when needed to, will make all the difference to your work / personal life.
5. INVEST IN YOURSELF
If you’ve made the decision to go back to work (or even if you don’t), then I’d say — always invest in yourself!
Take a course to update your skills.
Review your “personal brand” on Linkedin and yes, update that CV that you haven’t thought of for a while.
Consider getting a career coach or mentor through Mentor Mums, to help you navigate this process too. Not only will this help prepare your mindset for returning to work, but it will also give you a confidence boost and remind yourself of why you are so good at what you do!
